I was going through my phone’s pictures looking for something for throwback Thursday on instagram when I stumbled upon two things I didn’t want to see. The first thing was a picture of my coworker and I a couple months ago. We are hugging and smiling and look happy. The second thing I found was a video of the same coworker making me a poncho out of a trash bag. It’s silly and dumb but it still makes me laugh to watch it.

There is nothing wrong with the picture or the video. They are completely innocent. I guess I loathe them because they remind me of the innocence our friendship had. It bothers me that I lost a really good friend to a stupid decision and an excessive amount of vodka.

Mostly, I just wish I still thought of the two of us as good people.